This morning we had an ultra sound and did not hear what I was hoping to hear.
This has been a really hard day for me. I feel like I should be able to do more than what I am in order to protect my babies but I am so powerless and this is so hard for me to accept.
I crumble and I break and I know I need to stay strong for them but I cant even try to explain in enough words how difficult this is for me.
This morning They checked the fluid levels around the babies and when the levels get below 2 cm it is not good. Well Emma did not even have 1 cm. She has 0.76cm and Molly had 11 cm. So Molly's fluid is continuing to rapidly build back up and Emma is not able to produce enough fluid because Molly's sac is so big it continues to squoosh Emma. Therefore another amnio reduction is necessary to remove fluid from Molly in hopes that Emma can build some fluid back up before Molly produces too much again.
As the babies get bigger they are suppose to produce less fluid, so the hope is that my body can hold out all the amnio reductions necessary until they can hopefully stabilize their fluids. This 3rd amnio procedure is suppose to take place at some point tomorrow.
Everytime they do this reduction it is very painful for me. Inserting a needle into my uterus and draining fluid from my baby's sac is not exactly what I call comfortable. The pain is so sharp that it is even hard for me to breathe for several hours after the procdeure is over.
But the discomfort doesnt bother me as much as the risk involved of doing this procedure. Everytime they do this is another chance that I could go into labor. However, not doing it causes both babies to suffer. So we have to take that chance of pre term labor because them being outside the womb is better for them than being inside and recieiving too much fluid or not enough.
They also checked my cervix. The cervix is the muscle that holds the babies in. Once the cervix is short enough that it cant hold the babies in any longer, the babies come out. ( for those who dont exactly know) At anyrate, at this point in my pregnancy my cervix should be longer than 2 cm and it is 1.6cm. Just two weeks ago it was 3 cm so in just 2 weeks it has shortened half its size.
The nurse told me that they most likely will have to put me to sleep to stitch my cervix closed to prevent it from getting any shorter however, when the DR came in she said that this is not the case because I am too far long in my pregnancy for the stitch to even hold out. SO basically I am just having to play the waiting game. I have to keep praying that God allows my body to do everything it should do in order to give my babies the best chance at a healthy life.
Continue to pray that God gives the doctors the wisdom they need in order to give my babies the best care possible and pray that God protects my girls so that they can grow up to be happy healthy followers of Him.
I dont know exactly what God's plan is through all of this but I do know that for such a time as this He has placed these little girls inside of me for a reason. I know that their lives are not in vain. So God has to protect them! I love my girls so much and I just cant imagine life without them here with me. So continue to cry out to Jesus on behalf of them, because I NEED God to save my baby girls. I have never been so desperate for anything in all of my life.
This afternoon a friend of mine came and sat with me long enough for Rick to go home and get some things he needed and he told me that while he was home he went into their nursery and just got on his knees and wept. He said he put his hands on their cribs and prayed for them and then placed a Bible in each of their cribs and said that He is just expecting God to watch over them.
I am so thankful for a husband that has so much faith and is giving me so much comfort and love. My baby girls are so lucky to have a daddy that loves them so much. Thank you for all of you who continue to lift them and us in prayer.
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